Rains of sorrow

I don't know why, the usual me should be sleeping at this time of the day.
I don't know why I woke up at a fine weather too, it's raining.
I have a love-hate relationship with raining,
It is very often raining when I'm feeling down,
But it is very comfortable because it is so cold and dark,
For some reason I took a liking for the dark,
Maybe because I stay up for too long,
Or because I only stay at my room for so long?

Only one subject left in Wednesday,
The most challenging subject I guess,
I did the 3 subject okay I think,
There are no questions I can't finish completely,
As in some sub question contained inside the question.
Classmates really helped in today's paper,
All he said came out in the exam, kudos to him and me,
I am able to answer because of him,
But he is going to UK in the next year,
Means I lost one heck of a support huh?
But all the best with him, I want him to know he's a blessing to be here.

Sometimes, I have this feeling of melancholy,
When I see what happened recently, only from different perspective,
Different point of view, I figured something,
Or should I say I found something.
That time, when I emotionally broke down,
These friends, maybe just out of pity,
They just say that I can find them next time when I'm feeling down,
Like they will too likewise.
But when something really happened,
Sorry for humans are all selfish and realistic animals during this era,
Especially this time of day,
They all resort to complete lock down,
Resort to complete silence, they won't even break a sweat.
Resort to isolation, they won't even response you like usual.
With you guys like this, I'm starting to think,
Where should I lay when I'm really feeling down next time?
True, you are the one that hurt most because I'm just a spectator,
But that doesn't make you the one that hurts the most in the world,
You're just putting yourself way too high,
This world doesn't spin on you,
But the one around you are,
How can you forget everyone around you?
How can you ignore me? Even when I'm in time of need of you guys?
Where are you? Who are you now?

Ah, I think tears are running again,
As I thought, whenever there's raining,
There's always something misfortune happens,
This love-hate relationship still sustain itself naturally I guess.

Peace out.